and i think this needed its own post

i've had two make-out dreams in the past week. they were both with boys at school that i find extremely attractive and endearing but have no chance with, nor do i think i'd want one with. but it's just so odd when i see them the next day. but also funny. i couldn't take my eyes off boy #1 but then i avoided looking at boy #2 at all costs. i've had many dreams about boy #2. for a couple years actually. i might even go as far as to say that he's the most attractive boy at the school in my eyes. we haven't said many words to each other but from the ones that we have exchanged, i think he returns the "endearing" trait to me. from afar, i always think "wow he is way too good for me." but when it's just us, it's this strange energy that is created between us when one of us speaks. and what's great about it is that no matter if i'm right or wrong, it's fun to think that i will never know and he will never know and that nothing will ever screw up or would-be romance. it's like that how i met your mother episode in season 1. nothing can ever screw up our love, as long as we leave it at this.

(i'm extremely glad i wrote this. i understand my relationship with him a lot better now :D)