rain check

i could go on and on right now about how i'm a horrible, horrible person... how all i do is hurt people, and my perception of reality is as far off as another galaxy. but instead... i'm really definitely going to consider therapy. not right away. i'll get settled with school first... but even if i feel really good for a while, i think i should still consider it. i don't think i can really fix myself on my own at this point, you know?

besides... who wouldn't want to be taught how to live life by someone who has the same name as the female zombie-slayer in resident evil?

i deal with my emotions through films

"I understand feeling as small and as insignificant as humanly possible. And how it can actually ache in places you didn't know you had inside you. And it doesn't matter how many new haircuts you get, or gyms you join, or how many glasses of chardonnay you drink with your girlfriends... you still go to bed every night going over every detail and wonder what you did wrong or how you could have misunderstood. And how in the hell for that brief moment you could think that you were that happy. And sometimes you can even convince yourself that he'll see the light and show up at your door. And after all that, however long all that may be, you'll go somewhere new. And you'll meet people who make you feel worthwhile again. And little pieces of your soul will finally come back. And all that fuzzy stuff, those years of your life that you wasted, that will eventually begin to fade."
- Iris



i'm starting a new chapter... hell a new book.


:)



s'been almost a month since i've updated this! i'd go into description of what i've been doing, but "that would be counter-productive" of this post, you see :) i'm not looking back at all anymore... i'm getting a little nervous/slightly scared about moving in with strangers and starting school with strangers, but it's all exciting.

going shopping for apartment-things tomorrow :) moving in nine days!