perhaps vampires is a bit strong

I had an audition today, and I think it went well. If my competition included more talent, I'd have lower hopes, not to say that nobody who auditioned was good, but there was only 26 of us, I believe. And for three plays, that's 8 or 9 actors for each play.. But regardless of that encouraging statistic I'm not getting my hopes up. But seeing Macbeth last night was so inspiring; if I could just go to plays constantly, then I would be constantly inspired, and probably a much better actress.


top, cardigan, and beret: forever 21

This wasn't my outfit today, but this last Saturday - a beautiful Saturday, rainy and lazy, and studying and reading at 25 Main for the afternoon with rain pouring on the windows was so picturesque I could barely stand it. I also got myself a red beret last Friday in Vegas - it's not a legit French one or anything but it'll do for now. And I adore this new white shirt - unlike my beret it feels so French. I auditioned in it today. It leaves a nice impression.

So I'll just be waiting anxiously for the next few days. Being cast in a play right now is not only just something I would really enjoy, but it would solve a lot of problems - mainly relationship ones. We're both scared because we've lost our individuality - the very things that attracted us to one another. Our independence. And I need something in my life that's solely mine and somewhere to go and be, without my boyfriend. I'm actually currently really scared for my relationship, and I don't know if I'm just reading too much into it or what.

P.S. I've quit smoking weed for good and I'm not going to drink any alcohol in excess (so probably not at all). I've come to hate the person I am when I'm under the influence of those things. And I truly never thought I'd be saying this, I thought that people who say this are just stuck up. But it's all finally showed me what it can do to me and I really really hate it.